There are a few posts regarding types of ‘school mums’ and I thought I would give you my own ‘tongue in cheek’ list of common characters you find yourself amongst at the school gates.
Before you read on please bear in mind the following are NOT REAL people and this post is not intended to be offensive.
Janet – Janet’s are the super mums. They are popular and always attract a load of mummy’s to stand with at the gates. She always makes the best homework projects, helps out with school activities and a is great source of information for other parents. Janet probably started the mums Facebook group and would help out anyone.
Zoe – Everyone gawps at the Zoe’s. Unfairly thin and gorgeous, plastered in make up, hair done, usually in gym clothes or on her way to work and and drives a fabulous Range Rover. We all wonder how she has time to look so good! Zoe doesn’t really mix with many of the other mums.. only a clique of other Zoe’s.
Sarah – Now Sarah is one of the most common mums. She may or may not be new to this but doesn’t really talk to many other people and keeps herself to herself. Sarah barely has time to brush her teeth in the morning let alone apply a full face of make up! She’s a bit rubbish at home learning activities and her child is sometimes late.
Maggie – Oh there are always a few maggies. These mums moan and gossip about EVERYTHING! Conversations usually start with “so have you heard about that supply teacher?!”, “Can’t believe how much we have got to pay for that school trip! I’m gonna have words.” Or simply “Bloody weather. Hate being so hot/cold.” You’ll find them rabbitting to anyone who will listen and staying on to talk to the teacher. Maggie means no harm but sometimes you want to tell her to cheer/shut the frick up!
Rose – Rose is ‘alternative’ and maybe a bit grungy. They don’t get involved in all the school drama and have a cool, laid back ‘hippy’ attitude. Rose eats all organic and only wears fair trade clothes. Rose’s kid has awesome hair and is named London, or River Blue.
Shelley – We are slightly scared of Shelley. She is a loud mouth who constantly shouts at her naughty kids and rocks up with her pram like she owns the place, she may even give you dirty looks. Shelley has a bit of a following and they all bitch and laugh about the other mums together. Saying that, if you got to know Shelly, she’s probably quite alright and the hard exterior may be for show.
Toni – Poor tony. She doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going! Toni is as ditsy and clumsy as they get, always late for the pick ups, forgetting mufti days and homework deadlines… generally living in her own little world. Shelley’s just love to take the mick out of innocent Toni’s, but do you know what? Toni couldn’t give a… Or probably doesn’t even notice.
So do you recognise a few of the above?
Which school mum are you?!
Til next time,